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Date:2008-07-29 15:04
Subject:Thank you!

I just wanted to thank everyone for your support on this new lifestyle change. I saw your comments and they meant a lot to me. Whenever I need motivation, I'll be sure to look back on that.


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Date:2008-07-28 11:11
Subject:Week 1 Results
Mood: impressed


Every Sunday night before dinner we're doing our weigh in and measurments. So in week 1, I lost 1 pound and 5 inches (2 off my bust and 3 off my waist). I'm not getting to excited yet. I'm going to take the month average for inches lost - measuing is tough because you never know if you're getting the measurement from the same place. But all in all, a motivating start!

I ended up working out at the gym 4 days last week for 30 minutes each time. Averaging 400 calories lost. And 5 days last week I ended up going on walks with Jacob that were at least 30 minutes. So I'm sure that helped too.


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Date:2008-07-21 08:07
Subject:Day 1 - Reality Check and Goal Setting
Mood: accomplished

Today's plan to begin my lifestyle change (NOT diet as Nicole so cleverly pointed out). I'll tell you point blank, yesterday's weigh in was 210. MUCH higher than expected. But it confirmed that yes, instead of losing weight, I was gaining it. But the 210 was definately an eye opener and reality check for me. Good, that's what I needed. We also measured my bust, waist, hips, and thighs. I can't recall what those were, but my bust measurement was much smaller than hips and waist and the bust was 43 I believe, so you can guess there's work to do.

I'm still working out what my exact goals are. Weight-wise, I want to be 140. The big decision is the 'by when' and 'at what pace.' I want realistic goals. I'm thinking of doing 5 pounds a month and be 140 by September next year. In my head though, that't not fast enough. BUT, realistic is what I want. I have this tendancy to self-sabotage every weight loss thing I do and I don't need not hitting my goals to be a factor in any negative decisions. I'll update later once i've decided what to do.

Now, I have to go fix breakfast. I plan on having oatmeal. I'm also going to do a lot of what Nicole suggested in terms of watching sugar and the whole grains. If anyone has any other tips, I'd love to hear them!

I'll also do a full day update at the end of the day on how I did today. So far I was able to go to the gym, so that was great! Didn't do much of a workout due to time. But, the goal for this week in terms of the gym is just to get there.

Talk to you later!

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Date:2008-07-20 14:36
Subject:Ready to Make a Serious Change

Have you ever saw a picture of yourself and thought 'who the hell is that fat thing in that picture?!' only to realize it was yourself? Well, I've now done that one too many times. Yes, I now I had a baby only 5 months ago. But I think I'm now gaining weight opposed to losing it.

Time for some serious changes in our lives!

Allan's out buying a scale and groceries for our new diet right now. Long story short, we're going to lose inches and pounds and actually take stock every month of what we're doing. No set goals yet, because I'm not sure what I weigh or what my inches really are. But that will come tomorrow. The game plan for now is to get up at 5:30am and work out 4 days a week. Allan will be getting up at that time as well to get things ready for Jacob. The diet won't really change all that much with the exception of a few things:

1) buy lower fat options whenever available
2) try and meal plan healthier menus (but not a slap on the hand if something like pizza slips through)
3) portions, portions, PORTIONS!

I'll keep you posted on how things go!

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Date:2008-07-17 13:46
Subject:Some people...
Mood: curious

Ok, why is it that some people can be so ignorant? For those who do not have children, would you walk up to someone you only met once and litterally TAKE that person's child from their arms without asking first? Or would you just start feeding someone's child whatever you wanted to see what the child's reaction would be?

I've experienced that now countless times in the last 2 weeks and I'm about to go postal. The feeding has been done by Allan's family members and Greg (Allan's mom's new boyfriend). Yeah... They just started feeding him frosting off a cake TWICE! Noone asked if Allan and I approved, they just did it. And Greg got the bright idea to give Jacob a Cheeto the other day! What the hell is wrong with these people. For one, Jacob shouldn't be eatting these things yet. And two, it's really robbing Allan and I from '1st' experiences with Jacob that we wanted to enjoy.

And now the grabbing thing. This chick is someone who is WAY old enough to know better and has kids of her own. Allan plays poker with her every Monday - she's in her 40's (late) I believe and has a 25 year old boyfriend. So we had this poker group over on a Saturday night. The following Tuesday, Allan let her borrow his truck and she was dropping it off. So she walked in the door, thanked me for letting her borrow the truck and screamed when she saw Jacob (she missed him the Saturday night and I guess has been dying to meet him - that's striking me funny on another note, but that's a topic for another time). She then proceeds to hand me the keys and litterally rips Jacob from my arms so she can hold him. I was so speechless I didn't know what to do. He started crying, so I took him right back. I was so pissed I brought it up with Allan and told him to watch her. She must have this feeling she can feel she can do what she likes with our family and I didn't want him to get caught up in something she felt she could take the liberty of with HIM if you know what I mean...

Anyway, have any of you ever expereinced this before?

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Date:2008-07-04 12:37

Poop guess my posting pics wasn't too successful. In the meantime, I have an album on Facebook of Jacob. :)

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Date:2008-07-03 14:08
Subject:Photo Test
Mood: creative

OK, so I'm finally getting with the times and uploaded osme images of Jacob to a website so you can see the cutie pie! I only have pregnancy pics through 4 months up. He turned 5 months on Tuesday!! He's almost sitting up on his own. He now can roll over when he really wants to and is getting great at holding things in his hands. He even can hold his bottle at times (when there's not much in it).

Here he is! This is about 3 weeks old. Did it post? ;)

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Date:2008-03-07 09:55
Subject:Momma's Singing the Blues this Week
Mood: depressed

Not sure why, but the baby blues hit me hard last week. Probably because the revcovery has been really hard, I've been pretty sick, my friends/family live so far away, and I'm just worn out. The good news is that Wendy is on her way next week for a visit and Allan is off work at home with us for the next week.

The blues are just so odd. I'm ok during the day, but as soon as night falls, I just cry. No reason really, I just let it out. Allan wants me to go out more often. I'll try. It's really like a depression where you don't want to do anything. So it's easier said then done. I'm supposed to call around today to see if anyone wants to go for a drink tomorrow or tonight. We'll see.

Jake is getting circumsized today. Not looking forward to that. Not only am I not looking forward to it for the discomfort of little Jacob, but it ain't cheap! I think about $300 when it's all said and done. Oye...

Better go grab some breakfast while Jake is sleeping.

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Date:2008-02-29 12:51
Subject:Long over due update
Mood: exhausted

Sorry it's been forever since I've posted anything or updated anyone on my labor and Jake, but we've been just so crazy busy since he came almost 3 week early!

Basically, the long and the short of it is I'm glad it's over. I had a text book start to my labor. Which is unusual for a first pregnancy. A day before I went into labor, my mucus plug came out. And then my water broke. it was very obvious. The alarm went off for us to go to work, I thought I had to toot (which is normal for a morning), but instead of a toot, I noticed it felt more like I pushed something litterally out. I stood up to see if anything had happened, and I felt that my pjs were soaked. Because I tested postive for GBS (group B step - about 30% of pregnat women have this - no biggie), they tell you to go to the hospital as soon as your water breaks because they need to start antibiotic ASAP. This happened ay 7:30am.

So we make a few calls to our parents, grab our bags and the remaining things to put in them, and hit the hospital. We arrived and was admitted by 8:30 I believe.

By 9 they had confirmed my water broke (not sure why they had to confirm it, I told them it did) and examined me. I was 100% effaced and 2 cm dilated. They also told me Jake was really low in the canal already.

After 5 hours of labor pains they FINALLY let me have the epidural (2pm). I couldn't believe that they made me actaully feel the pain so I would appreciate the epidual and what labor felt like (the nurse's words) before they'd let me have it. Once I had it, all the pain went away.

So a few hours later, I think it was 5, I was 100% dilated. They also realized that Jake was turned "wrong" so that his spine was facing up. So they tried to turn him with foresepts and had me push a bit (this was arounf 6). They soon found out that he wasn't as low as they had thought. And I should stop pushing for an hour or so.

2 hours later (around 8), they came back and said he had turned facing the correct way and I should begin pushing. They also noted that the contractions weren't being picked up by the machine so I would need to let them know when I felt the urge to push. Now... this is really dumb considering that when you have an epidural, you can't feel this! So I dinked around guessing at when I should push for about an hour or so. Finally at 9 the delivering OB (which was the on call OB) came in and asked me if I wanted to "speed things up with the foresepts." Keep in mind, I'm just thinking that he was going to help Jake down a bit. Dumb of me. I also wasn't reminded of the other options (like the vacuum which is much easier on both Jake and I). So I said yes. Jake was then born at 9:20pm.

I won't go into too many deatails about the recovery. Just that it took about 30 minutes for them to sew me up (with 4th degree cutting/tearing) and Jake had some pretty good head trama. As well as neck muscle trama which we just found out about. We were in the hospital for 48 hours. Now, let me just say too that I think the delivery and this experience was very out of the norm and a result of it being just a dumb hospital.

So here we are now at 2.5 weeks old. I'm still recovering (I guess it takes about 6-8 weeks to fully recover and stop bleeding) and Jake is now in physiotherapy 2-3 days a week to help loosen a spased neck muscle. He also has his days and nights confused. Fun, fun fun. :)

K, Jacob is sleeping so it's time for mommy to take a nap! Yea!

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Date:2008-02-01 12:55
Subject:4 weeks to go and counting!

That's right, I hit 36 weeks today. I can't believe that in 4 weeks, our baby could be here. Crazy...

It's a snow day today. We're supposed to get about a foot of snow today with freezing rain mixed in. I usually work fromhome now on Fridays, Tuesday and Friday actually, so it worked out well. Allan came home early today, so he's out dealing with the driveway.

Should be a busy weekend - one of the last really busy ones I hope. Tomorrow Allan has a carpet installation to do. Great timing though - about $600+ for a days work! We just bought almost $600 in baby gear, so that'll be nice. I'll be relaxing, so that's good. And Sunday we're going to Kelly and Renald's for Desmond's 7th birthday and the Superbowl. Should be fun!

I'm also counting down the days until I'm done with work. Less than 2 weeks to go! Really only 9 business days and 4 of those today I work from home. Can't beat that!

So today the plan is to get my hospital bags packed and get the baby things for the hospital washed that need to be (sleepers, receiving blankets, etc). I've been gathering things for about 2 weeks and Allan is getting antsy. Over the weekend, my goal is to have the baby's room a bit more organized and my office a bit more organized as well. This is also our photo station, so if I'm ever going to send pictures, this is where I need to work on them!

Ok, better get some work done. I'm such a procrastinator.....

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Date:2008-01-28 14:39
Subject:Shower Update

Thank God, the shower went smoothly. Sharon and Rosa were talking most of the time. It was awkward, and you could feel that vibe, but it was ok. Whew! I didn't go off on Sharon for taking the liberty to potentially start World War 3 at my shower, but I did mention to her that I didn't know about it until yesterday. She seemed surprised I didn't know. Ug.

The shower was fun. Evenyone got us clothes, diapers, and wipes, so there's still a LOT of necessities that we need to get (crib matress, boobie pump, changing pad for the table, etc...). We also determined that the travel system (the infant car seat, base, and stroller set) that we got from Kelly and Renald was expired. Evenflo apparently only guarentees their stuff for 6 years past the manufacture date. So now we have to get that too. Cheap ones here are about $200. Oh well. What can ya do.

I hit 35 weeks last Friday. Wasn't sure if I mentioned that. Which means I only have about 2.5 weeks left until I start my maternity leave. YEA!!! And only 4.5 weeks until the little guy's due date. Exciting!

Hope everyone is good out there. I miss you!!

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Date:2008-01-26 16:33
Subject:NOT Impressed...
Mood: infuriated

My mother in law has once again crossed the line.

We gave her an opportunity to invite her friends to my shower tomorrow. Fine, perfect. BUT, she actaully invited her ex-husband Bill's daughter in law (Rosa) and her "step" grandchildren (Emily and Jaden). The divorse is NOT going smoothly, in fact it's like a move how brutial it's gotten. Bill's actaully brought Emily and Jaden into the middle of it saying that Ian's pissed about the whole thing and she is not to see Emaily and Jaden. So lets invite them to my shower and make it a whole fucking scene. Not impressed...

And what makes matters worse, is Sharon did this without even ASKING me how I felt about it. I even talked to Allan about it and he and I both agreed that would be a BAD BAD idea for them to be invited. So why the hell did she invite them? Ah, maybe because she's a bit selfish? Yep, that's my bet.


I also had to talk to Allan about Sharon's new boyfriend. He's a turd. He's got the immaturity of a 9 year old, parties like we did back in our 20s (EARLY 20s....), all wrapped up in a 50 year old body. I've known the man for maybe 2 months and he's already taken the liberty to insult my sister to her face (and behind her back), name our unborn child after himself, and just totally make me not want to ever be around him. And what pisses me off the most is that now, after Sharon insisted that she wanted to be on her own for at least a few years, she's decided to buy a house with this guy. And we're expected to treat him like family. I hate that. I had a talk with Allan the other night that I REALLY don't want the guy around me when I'm in the hospital. He's just not MY family or friend right now. And I don't care if he is seeing Sharon. Of course, I'm going to bend on that because Sharon will find a way to make it so I don't have a choice. But Allan HAS TO talk to her about the fact this man doesn't have a filter on his dumbass mouth. And he is not to say mean things to my family. I'm not making this guy up. The first time my sister came out here, and the first time he met her, he actaully said "man, don't they have food in MN?" Yeah..... Sharon did say later on that night she went off on him about how wrong that was, but the idiot proceeded to make comments about her weight to Allan and I the next time he saw us. I just abruptly said she's a hell of a lot more healthy than he was and changed the subject. What as ass....

Ok, sorry for the rant. But I do feel better. Thanks guys. :)

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Date:2008-01-23 17:00
Subject:Non-Stress test definately does NOT mean No stress!

I went in to the Dr. today for my usualy weekly pre-natal appointments. Normal enough. Well, the baby's heart rate was way high - 178 bpm. Normal is around 140/150 I think. So I was told I had to go right to the hospital for a non-stress to ensure the baby was ok.

Talk about friggen hard not to panic while you're driving yourself to the hospital!

I was hooked up to the baby monitor for about an hour. They had me lie on my side for a half hour a piece to ensure the heart rate was normal and to ensure that the kicks per hour were normal. Good news is everything is fine. Mama almost had a heartattack, but baby is fine... :)

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Date:2008-01-13 17:58
Subject:33 weeks and counting

Less than 7 weeks until little Jacob comes out. Well, lets hope 7 weeks. We still have a lot to do before he gets here. And unfortuanately, Daddy likes to play too much and moommy is just too tired to get things done. Soooo, we'll see.

I still tend to think they got my due date wrong. I've noticed that I think the baby has dropped. I feel him much much lower now and more significant is I feel like there's not as much pressure "up top." Could just be that he's turned. But I won't know until my next appointment Wednesday. But I guess if he's dropped, it could mean only a little as 3 more weeks to go. Yikes!

And he moves like MAD!! It's getting to a pain that it's REALLY uncomfortable now. Not much I can do of course.

Anyway, not much else is new here. Baby and work, that's about it!

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Date:2007-11-03 14:29
Subject:Week 23!
Mood: calm

Wow, next week I'll be 6 months along!

Things are going ok. I'm finding it a lot harder to keep it together lately. One minute I'm really happy and the next minute I'm crying. So manic! But it's normal. It'll pass.

Last night we went to a friend's place for dinner (Kevin and Christina). Was fun! Still hard because I get to tired after 9. And I go from being content to STARVING in a matter of minutes. Which is tough when you're not at home. But, Christina's been there and has an 8 month old little girl, so she had a ton of food and said to help myself whenever I needed. So that helped.

Had my monthly Dr appointment last Thursday. Picture perfect pregnancy she said. Weird thing though. I've notived that the baby's heart rate is slowing. It started at 170 in the 3 mobth I believe. Then was in the 160s and now is 150. Is that normal? Must be if I'm having the perfect pregnancy. Weird.

So Allan is down stairs playing handyman in the guest room. We're renovating it. Almost gutting it with the exception of the carpet and 2 of the 4 walls. Should be fun. We have a deadline of the 15th of December. We're having a Christmas party here and I'm sure people will need to use it!

I've been reading a lot about things you can do prenatally to stimulate the baby and help ease your baby into the "big world." They say to talk to your baby a lot, think happy loving thoughts, and rub your belly. They also say to listen to classical music, specifically Boach and Beethoven. Something about the beats per minute replicating that of the mother's heart or something? So, I've been listening to it a lot mroe lately. Right now I have a Baby Einstein "Baby Neptune" on. "An inspiring classical music experience for babies featuring Handel's Water Music." I also have Baby Einstein "A soothing classical music experience for babies." Well, it can't hurt I guess! ;)

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Date:2007-10-25 18:37
Subject:22 weeks and counting

So I hit 22 weeks tomorrow. Wow...

And, news on the baby front. We're having a boy! Funny, a while ao I had a dream it was going to be a boy. No one ever mentioned though that ultrasounds hurt though. Owch! But I did get the pics too. I got 4 of them for free! From what I've heard, they usually charge?

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Date:2007-10-17 19:56
Subject:Week 20!

Well, we made it. 20 weeks into the pregnancy. HALF WAY THERE!

My sister is coming out this weekend for a visit. Will be nice to see her and show her my new home. We're taking her to Niagara Falls for the day on Saturday and then Sunday we have to watch Allan at his pool legue. Well, we don't HAVE to, but she'd like to.

Next Thursday we're going to have our big ultrasound (a bit late actually) and hope to find out the sex of our little one! Can't wait. :)

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Date:2007-10-06 18:11
Subject:Stuffed...and not just the contents of a turkey!
Mood: full

Wow, I'm stuffed. Our Thanksgiving dinner turned out GREAT! For someone that doesn't cook, I sure make a mean stuffing, corn muffin, and deviled egg! Allan handled the bird and the mashed potatoes. He also did the dishes TWICE today. He was great. I only had one breakdown of tears in the kitchen. It's been like that. ;)

Now Allan is passed out on the couch and I'm just hurting from eating too much. Skitz is feeling no pain either. She's purrrring up a storn next to us on the couch. She could have had some left overs, but she actaully doesn't like anything that's human food.

So we picked out the "theme" for the baby bedding, lamp, etc. It's Sesame Street. We were able to register for it online at Target. Only bummer is that the stuff is Online Only and out of stock. Nicole, when are you getting more in?! ;)

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Date:2007-10-06 11:57
Subject:Week 19
Mood: calm

Yes, yesterday was week 19. One more week and we'll be half way there. Insane! Feeling pretty good. Beginning to feel pressure more in my lower abdomine. Dr says that's normal. It's just my uterus getting bigger. But just strange feelings now that the baby is getting bigger.

So I booked my big ultrasound. October 25! We're going to find out if it's a baby boy or girl that day. That just blows my mind! Bets anyone? ;)

This weekend is our Thanksgiving weekend. So we get Mondy off. Today Allan and I are doing the traditional turkey dinner. We're making turkey, stuffing, deviled eggs, and corn muffins. All for us! Left overs for a year! Monday we'll go to Sharon's for Thanksgiving dinner too. But she always does ham. And doesn't do the stuffing "right." That's why we're having two! We're also meeting Sharon's new boyfriend that day. Should be intersting... I expect it to go well. Just awkward. At 31 you just don't expect to be meeting your mom/MIL's new boyfriend. You know?

So I changed my mind too on what to be for Halloween. Allan and I just figured out that to be Britt and K-Fed, it wasn't going to be too difficult. That when it came down to it, would anyone really know who we were? So now, I'm going as an angel and Alla'n's going as a devil. Which is kinda funny because one of our best friends by pure coincidence is going as Jesus. :) Too funny!

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Date:2007-09-18 10:35
Subject:Halloween Idea
Mood: content

So I'm trying to think of ideas for Halloween costumes that would be fun while being pregnant. So here's my idea. I'm going as ghetto Britney Spears. :) Yeah... I'm getting one of those Fruit of Alume (how DO you spell that?!) undershirts and writing "Mrs. Federline" on it and wearing a black bra under it. Then I'll get Starbucks that day and carry my cup around with me and a bag of Doritos. Oh, and a truckers hat. :) Great eh?! I'm trying to convince Allan to be K-Fed but I don't think he's buying it. Oh wel!!

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